SMASH Photobooth

A professional session with a seemingly professional environment in Sydney.
A few weeks ago.

Sebastian Michaelis
Black Butler

Photography.

A slight newborn interest flared within his innards.

Photography.

A classy term, describing the art of taking magnificent pictures. However saying that, M does not have a professional camera...however his interest was of a long standing conclusion from his way of taking photographs.

Nerang Valley. Queensland, Australia

Itsukushima-jinja. Miyajima, Japan.

And today, he finally met her.
A long, heartbreaking week for him.
But his somewhat cheerful eyes took a photograph of her beautiful smile, that resided in his heart all along.

Library.

The time now, 3:30pm.

M is sitting in the quiet halls and corridors of the Griffith Library, hoping to absorb some contact with his studies.
And it's only the first week...

And he, still anticipating her reply...
Her call.
It felt like an eternity.
Waiting for someone that you deeply cherish, yet somehow really less in return.
Unneeded maybe.

Earlier today though, Market Day was held.
The colourful limelight of a University, briefly shone upon.
And he, stuck in his Japan Club corner.
Serving patrons alike with amusement and information.

Wish he could cosplay, he thought.

Haircut

A miniscule haircut from today.

"How are you?"

"How are you? Are you okay there...? Are you safe...? Are you having fun? "

"Do you miss me...?"

Things that he wants to ask her.
She left for a trip with her beloved mother to the Australian Outback, for a week.

"I'll call you when I reach there..."

Her text enlightened him before she left.
His phone did not receive anything from her thereafter.
No sign of contact...for 2 days straight. 
And he, increasingly worried as day passes.

Wondering if she is thinking about him right now...
Wondering if she does miss him...
Wondering if she longing to be with him right now...
Or maybe only her boyfriend...and not M.

And today, the start of the final semester for M.
Here's hoping that he will graduate...which is highly unlikely due to his complications with his subjects as of this moment...

Baka

All he could think of was the word,

"ばか。"

Stupid, for short.
To himself, and her.
But he'd like to say sorry to her...
Probably the last time he'll ever do so.

He laid on his bedside, with pouring emotions and memories.
Of her.

She did not say anything for 2 days...
And he is losing hope.

A little detour.

The corridors of the train and its miniscule seating brought M back from the airport.

"A little detour, maybe." He wondered. 

"Meet me before your work!"

A text was sent to her.
A meter away from her workplace...he finally met her after the long weekend.

"Welcome back..." She humbly said.

He gave her a meaningless present...
And proceed to poke her palm continuously.
She however, held his hands thereafter.

Warm and gentle...as it always have been.

SMASH

A foggy day in the capital, Sydney.

The streets revealed two unwary, unnerving cosplayers; him and his brother. Heading to the venue. Heading to SMASH, the yearly anime convention held here.

M was surprised that many attendees remembered him from his previous endeavors in Sydney Supanova.

The night loomed.
The corner of his apron buzzed; someone was on the phone.
It was her on the other side of the receiver.

And again, he entered a blissful state of mind.

Indecisive.

A sunny day out in the Valley for a lunch with her.

However, that brought locked memories and feelings into her.
Feelings that aren't reciprocated towards M but her boyfriend.

Heartbroken, he thought.
He could do nothing about it.
Neither could she.

They sat quietly on the banks of the river, reminiscing the fact that both are on a standstill.
Upset.
Unable to turn words to each other.
Unable to return each others feelings.
She still kept her resolve...her supposedly only answer; her boyfriend.
But M was still determined to change her.
To stay by her side...

The bus came, she poked him.
M did not utter any words of goodbye.
And her wounded, depressing expression on the opposite side of the bus window, left a scar on his heart.

Holding on to something he can't reach...

Truth.

And she spoke what was in her heart all along...

And he knew she would say so.

"...and I still love him..."

"...I can't hurt you anymore...."

"I can't go to you..."

She, made him. Kept him going.

Her voice was the glitter of hope that resided within him. Her warmth, was the one that held him during his great sorrow. Her encouragement brought a smile to his face every time. Her needless antics gave him his laughter.


But now, he has to let go...

"Thanks....", he said.

From all his heart...he poured tears over the phone...

And even now.

In truth, he couldn't accept the reality...